Now, getting a date is a topic that is misunderstood by most people.
For men: You DO NOT have to say something like “Hey baby, would you go out with me?” etc. You have to keep the whole thing very subtle!
For women: You do not need to wait for the man to “ask you
out”. You can ask him out. But again you must do it very subtly.
If you do it right, he will not even notice that you asked him out. His
ego will come in the way.
So, what is the best way to get your first date? Basically, you have to let your partner "earn" their first date. If they "earn" their first date, they will be proud of it. And even though it will be a first date, they will not realize it!
For example: Let your partner tell you how good she/he is at painting until you mention that you are looking for a painting to put up in your house and you would like to look at his/her collection. When you meet him/her to see the collection, that’s you first date. You can always extend the meeting by going out for lunch afterwards.
Let your partner tell you about how much he/she likes rock music,
before you tell him/her that you just happen to have 2 passes to the
next rock show and your friend canceled on you!
You get the basic idea. In the conversation, your partner will mention details about themselves and what they find interesting. You have to pick up on one of these details and make it the reason to meet once more. It has to be a completely logical reason and should make sense. This will make your partner feel that you are genuinely interested in your partner and that he/she has earned the next meeting (i.e. date)
For women, this technique will not make it obvious that you are asking for a date. His ego will come in the way and he will convince himself that you are interested in what he does or what skill he has etc.
For men, use this technique a little later in your first conversation. Also make sure the reason to meet is a good logical reason. Women like to feel that you appreciate them and their skills. So do not make it obvious that you are just asking for a second date, she might not be that impressed by you.
One question that women wonder about is whether they should play
“Hard to get!” Should you pretend that you are not really
Well, if you ask a man, what kind of women he would prefer, one who plays “hard to get” or one who plays “easy to get”, most men will tell you the woman who plays “hard to get”. But unfortunately, even though this is what men say, this is not really what they feel.
As study (Playing Hard to Get: Understanding an Elusive Phenomenon) was conducted to answer this question… They found that men DO NOT like women who are hard to get.
On the other hand there is a particular kind of “hard to get” that men find very attractive.
Basically, a man is much more attracted to a woman if he knows that she is “hard to get” for other men but “easy to get” for him. This makes the women feel very attractive and special in the man’s eyes.
So, women, here is what you can do: Considering playing hard to get? Don't . . . with him. When he asks you for a date, respond immediately and energetically, "Oh, I'd love to!" But then, later, subtly drop hints that you're hard to get for other men. Be very subtle.
Now, the question is, what do you do on your first date?
You now already know the art of conversation. If you use it well on your first date, things should stay interesting. Here, we are going to just provide you with a few more scientifically proven tips to make your first date a even better experience…
When planning your first date, try to find out what your partner finds “arousing”. Something that your partner will be “excited” or “touched” by! Something that will generate “emotions” in your partner. If you do this, you will share an “experience” together. Firstly this will bond you to one another. Secondly, your partner will associate you with the “great feeling” that she got from the experience.
For women: The way to a man's heart is through his stomach—and his wallet. When going out for food, suggest the name of a fabulous, charming, and inexpensive restaurant. He will appreciate it. Anyways, he probably does not want to spend big bucks on you for your very first date.
For men: If you're dining out on your first date, take her to a restaurant with an atmosphere like you want to project: Elegant? Calssy? Cool? Arty? Atmosphere is important because she'll transfer her feelings about the room to you.
Besides that, have a good time! I am sure you will know how to handle it from here on. If you have a good time with your partner, then do not worry too much. Things will go well and your relationship will progress. You already know a lot about conversation eye-contact etc. and all this will help you even further down the line…
Best of luck!
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