Women, you may think the responsibility for the "pickup" is on the
man. Surprisingly, though, research shows that women initiate
two-thirds of all pickups.
In the animal kingdom, wannabe-lovers attract each other by hooting,
crowing, or stomping the ground. A female chimpanzee will spot her
mate, stroll up to the male, and tip her buttocks toward his nose to
get his attention. Among humans too, the female will do many things to
attract the male. But they are much more subtle in humans…
A researcher named Monica Moore heard that women made two-thirds of the
approaches and wanted to find out exactly how they did so. So, she set
up a study where she observed more than two hundred women at a party
and recorded what non-verbal signals women gave to attract males.
Below is a list of all the different methods and how many times that
particular method was successful in attracting the male. When we say
“successful”, we mean that the particular move was
successful in getting the male to come over and talk to the woman. So,
if you want to get some one to notice you, you could do one of
these….
Smile at him broadly (511)
Throw him a short, darting glance (253)
Dance alone to the music (253)
Look straight at him and flip your hair (139)
Keep a fixed gaze on him (117)
Look at him, toss your head, then look back (102)
"Accidentally" brush up against him (96)
Nod your head at him (66)
Point to a chair and invite him to sit (62)
Tilt your head and touch your exposed neck (58)
Lick your lips during eye contact (48)
Ask for his help with something (34)
Tap something to get his attention (8)
Shy? Do you feel he'll think you are too forward if you smile broadly
at him in the crowd or "accidentally" brush up against him? He won't,
because, happily, the male ego takes over! Ten minutes later, he won't
even realize that he was not the one who made the initial contact.
Moore, the researcher, said that men think they are making the first
move when they are actually responding to women's nonverbal signals.
So, don’t be shy, cause he will not notice!
Especially if you are a woman, once you get him to approach you and talk to you, you must make sure that you do not give him any body language signals that scare him away.
When he comes to talk to you, even if you look in some other
direction and pretend to be bored, you may scare him. He might read
this as, “she is not interested” and he might leave so that
you do not reject him. So handle all this delicately. Once he is
talking to you, use all those eye-contact tricks and give him your
attention.
Men should do the same. Do not look away, or turn away form the woman.
This will make her feel that she is being rejected and she might leave.
So, basically handle all this delicately. You do not want to hurt
anyone’s ego in the process.
Now, still the question remains, what do you say? What do you talk about?
Next - The art of conversation... >>
<< Previous - How to approach her? (For Men)
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